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Blog July 6, 2021

How to Cope With the Feeling of Nostalgia After Moving

Posted in Psychology of Moving
Eva Johnson

Digital nomad born in New York but currently living online, Eva knows everything there is to know about packing and moving.

We have all felt some sort of nostalgia at some point of our lives. Be it the nostalgia for some times that have long passed, then the nostalgia for certain people, the nostalgia for some places we visited and had the most amazing time there, it all boils down to a certain feeling of sadness that has to be replaced by something else in order for us to precede happily with our lives. However, probably the worst sort of nostalgia is the one when we miss the town where we have spent a certain part of our lives in. Most people would agree that it’s the worst one because it in a way combines all the aforementioned nostalgias into one. It is not only the town that we miss. We miss the feeling of safeness, familiar faces, that feeling of belonging. Upon moving into another city everything changes. Our perception of the world and people in it also change. That feeling can be so strong and powerful that most people tend to feel like strangers and outcasts and become completely withdrawn and not willing to socialize. This social isolation is very dangerous and it’s important for it to be cut at the roots.

Even though we have moved to a certain place with a strong reason, either for some job opportunity, better life conditions or similar, to start your life from the scratch is not easy for anyone. This is especially difficult when it comes to a long distance moving. The greater the distance from your former residence is, the harder the process of adjustment becomes.

There are several ways in which we can improve our state of mind even if we are far away from all the things we still feel attached to:

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1. Do some prior research regarding the place you are about to move into in order to create some positive feelings

Anything interesting that you dig up about the place you’ve chosen as your future residence will contribute to your positive feeling related to it. Find some details regarding its culture, customs and amusing places that you think would be pleasant and informative for you to see. Get to know the place before you set your foot on its grounds. And be open-minded. Don’t feel resentful for having to adjust to the new surroundings. Your own attitude can be the obstacle number one on your way towards living happily.

2. Always find time to talk to your friends and relatives

Even though you should strive hard to adjust to the new environment you should always find time for your closest ones. Their support will give you strength to overcome any obstacle. Also, this way you are letting them know that you care about them and thus there is no place for resentful feelings on each side.

3. Make new friendships and you will feel less nostalgic for not having you old friends around all the time

However, your old friends cannot help you when it comes to adapting to the new surroundings. You will need someone you can rely on in the times of need. So, be kind and polite to people. Try to make connections either at your place of work, while shopping or even going for a walk in the park. The sooner you make friendships with the residents, the faster you’ll feel as a part of the target community. Positive experiences will take your mind off of the sad thoughts or any other hardships that are troubling you.
Your neighbors could be the greatest source of information. Certainly, when you come to a new place even the street you live in is a completely unknown and ambiguous territory which only waits to be explored. Instead of working things on your own on hard way, you can simply get to know your neighbors a bit better and you will be familiar with everything you need to know.

If you work on adapting to people in your new surroundings, you are going to feel much lesser need to think about how sad you are. The frightening experience of loneliness and nostalgia will be filled with new experiences and a wide scope of novelties.

4. Devote to yourself

Upon moving to a new place, your head is packed with all the things that should be done in the shortest amount of time possible. You dedicate your time to the paper work, unpacking, most likely your new job, and you don’t allow yourself to sit back and simply breathe in all new things that the new place has to offer to you. And again, you allow the negative emotions prevail over the positive ones and all this negativity is now attached to the new surroundings. You don’t notice the beautiful opportunities you have at hand because, in your mind, they’re part of something daunting.

5. Don’t compare the old to the new

The worst thing you can do is to start contrasting and finding the flaws in your new residence. So what if the traffic is much worse than in you previous town, if your neighbors are much louder and if the weather was much to your taste before? That’s not the way you should be looking at things now. Embrace the options, opportunities and the good stuff. Each city has a different energy. Only when you give in will you be able to truly enjoy it and not lament for the things that belong to your past.

And finally, it all comes down to this. When you have already settled into your new place of living, you should get out of your comfort zone and start to explore all the new opportunities. Only that way will you be able to relate the new place to positive emotions and truly enjoy your current residence.

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