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Blog October 22, 2021

Is Moving for Love a Good Idea? It Can Be if It’s for Right Reasons

Posted in Moving 101
Steven Rogers

Apart from sharing Captain America's name, our freelance writer Steven is also a big fan of moving, history, and geography.

Moving for love is undoubtedly one of the best things that can happen to a person. You finally found your soul mate, and you’re willing to start a new life chapter together. But is this really a good idea? Are you ready to give up everything you currently have? Are you ready to leave your home, family, friends, and job? How will you adapt to changes, or can you adjust at all?

Is It Worth Moving for a Relationship?

You have finally found your soulmate, and you’re excited that everything is going well, even though you live in different states. People move for various reasons, but moving for a relationship is one of the most romantic and beautiful ones. You feel like you’re ready to take things to the next level and start a life chapter in a new place together as a couple. What could possibly go wrong? Well, first of all, you need to give this a second thought and think about how well you actually know your significant other.

How Long Should You Be in a Relationship Before Moving In?

Is it okay to move for love? Well, yes, if both sides honestly believe that this is a good idea. But how long have you known your partner? Have you ever lived in the same city, or have you been in a long-distance relationship since day one? If you’ve never had a chance to spend much time with them, this can potentially pose an issue. One thing is certain – after moving for love, the long-distance relationship you’ve had until now will change drastically. 

Logically, you can’t really get to know a person well enough without spending a lot of quality time together – texting or chatting frequently is not enough to support this decision, even if you are head over heels for them. You don’t want to end up disappointed if something goes wrong once you really get to know them. 

On the other hand, if you’re certain in your emotions and strongly believe that this is the right time to move because you believe you two have a future together, this might be one of the best ways for a fresh start. Don’t overthink it and grab this opportunity even if you’re scared – the best things in our life sometimes come with a risk.

Should I Relocate With My Boyfriend or Girlfriend? Your Partner Can Be Your Biggest Support or Biggest Disappointment

Relocating to another state alone isn’t easy, and starting to live alone in an unknown city might cause severe emotional problems, so going through the relocation process with a significant other can be a great way to have a stress-free move. This is only possible if you are both certain about your feelings and believe that you’re making the right decision. If your partner, for example, is relocating their business and suggests you go with them, should you accept his offer right away? 

Sure, you can always hire professionals for corporate moving services and go through the move safely, but are you thoroughly ready for this big step? You don’t want to move in a hurry and make a fatal mistake without thinking this thing through. Read on to find out how to know if this is the right decision for you.

A couple that just moved with the help of cross-country movers Living together has many benefits

Set Your Priorities Before Making Any Final Decisions

You can be certain in your feelings but still unsure if the move is something you’re ready for. The key is to have open communication with your significant other and stay true to yourself. You won’t be able to have a healthy relationship if you’re not happy about the relocation. You need to set your priorities straight and think about how the change of environment is going to affect you. Avoid relocation depression and reduce potential relocation stress by making this decision for the right reasons.

Think About How You Are Going to Feel – It’s Your Life After All

Sure, spending a whole lifetime with someone might seem like a wonderful idea, but do you really want to spend it all at a place you don’t like? You might, for example, move to a bigger city that opens up many opportunities for career development, but you might also move somewhere where you will be unable to find a good place to work or a nice home. What do you expect from yourself in the future? If you had a different vision before meeting this person, you need to ask yourself if you will be truly happy if you change everything about yourself for them.

Are You Making This Decision for Yourself or for the Person You Love?

If you’re relocating only because you want to be with another person, this is simply not enough, and eventually, you will regret your decision once you start struggling. Packing your whole life in one suitcase and leaving everything behind is a big deal and you shouldn’t make this decision only for love, even if it is the most important thing for you. Remember that people sometimes change and break up – you don’t want this to happen to you without having a backup plan.

Don’t Move Only to Try Fixing Some Issues From the Past

All relationships have ups and downs, and it’s not always ideal nor easy to face reality. Are the issues in your relationship only related to distance, or are there some other problems involved? For example, if you previously had problems with codependency and lack of trust, bridging the distance can make these problems even more difficult. On the other hand, if you believe that you suffer from a lack of partner’s dedication, you can both agree that living together might fix this.

This is something that you need to be honest with yourself about. Maybe you have some issues that even a life together can’t solve. Every expert will advise you to fix these issues before making any ground-breaking decisions. We’re not saying that you shouldn’t give it a try and do everything in your power to fight for your loved one, but unfortunately, even with the best intentions, relocating across the country won’t be enough.

Couple fighting before relocating with long-distance movers This can be a challenging process, and you have to set priorities to avoid troubles

Do You Have a Backup Plan?

It is understandable that you don’t want to have a long-distance Valentine’s Day or spend important holidays away from your loved one, but a part of you is already used to not seeing your significant other every day. Once you move and start living away from your home, you might, for example, experience adjustment insomnia or other psychological issues. Your significant other can help you get over them, but what if they don’t? What if you two discover that you’re simply not a good fit anymore and decide to break up? What are you going to do in this unknown place on your own?

What Can You Do in the New City if You Don’t Stay Together?

Firstly, you’ll meet neighbors. If your partner works all day and you’re feeling lonely, these people in your close environment might be good for breaking the ice. If you bump into them in front of your apartment and they seem friendly, feel free to tell them you’re new around there and ask them for advice about things you’re interested in. Making friends in a new city can be challenging, and you might feel lonely at the beginning, but as soon as you find them, you’ll start feeling much better and less dependent on your significant other.

Don’t forget about getting a job even if you’re currently comfortable just enjoying all the things that are happening in your love nest. This should be one of your priorities. What’s more, the network of coworkers might be a good place for meeting people. If you have a job and know at least someone from your town, it will be much easier to go through rough moments in your relationship, or even a break-up if it happens. Check out this video for more tips on how to be less codependent in relationships.

YouTube video

Don’t Risk It if You’re Struggling Financially

Relocation costs, especially if you’re moving across the country for love, can be high. To prevent unnecessary complications and potential troubles, ensure you’re financially stable enough to go through this. Sure, you can always get a job in the new city, but you need to have stability, at least for the adaptation period.

If your partner already lives in another place and you are planning to live under one roof, you also need to consider if their current home is big enough for both of you. This also depends on the future you imagine together. If you’re planning on starting a family, living in a one-bedroom apartment won’t be enough. If the real estate prices in the chosen city are high, you can, for example, consider living in the suburbs, at least until you get on your feet.

Have a Plan About a Mutual Budget

If you are moving to another state for a relationship and you start sharing a roof with your partner, you might as well start sharing a budget. You need to have this talk before the move. Is your partner currently stable and has a job that provides regular income? Unless you both agreed on them supporting you financially, but you need to start sharing the budget at some point. How are you going to do this? For example, if they own an apartment and you don’t need to pay rent, at least you can split bills with them or pay for groceries. If one of you pays for the furniture you both need, the other one can offer to pay for professional packing services, for example.  

You don’t want to become a burden – you’re partners, and no one should be responsible for other people’s expenses unless agreed otherwise. One of the greatest benefits of relocating together is that you can make smart financial decisions together and invest more money in your future.

Couple with a piggy bank after moving cross-country You need to have a hot talk about finances before making big decisions

The Benefits of Living With Your Significant Other and Starting a New Life Chapter Together

Now that you have considered all the potential complications and things you need to consider before making this big step, it’s time to talk about all the positive aspects of your move:

  • You will spend more time together, and your bond will become stronger,
  • It will be easier to make plans and do all the things you wanted to do together but never had a chance,
  • You can grow emotionally by going through different challenging situations together,
  • You won’t feel lonely,
  • You can share a budget and save money,
  • You can meet their friends and family if you’ve never had the chance before,
  • You can start a family of your own,
  • You’ll learn about each other’s flaws and learn how to overcome issues in better ways.
Professional cross-country movers Consider hiring professional cross country movers instead of relocating on your own

If You Believe That Moving for Love Is the Right Decision, Don’t Hesitate to Do It

Suppose you decided that relocating for love is really worth it and you’re willing to do what it takes to spend a future with your significant other – congratulations! This might be the beginning of the best period in your life, so don’t hesitate to do it, despite the risk. Relocating to a new state will be a great experience if you share your ups and downs with someone you deeply care about and who cares about you. Don’t forget to bring your relocation essentials and book available long-distance movers – the best is yet to come.

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